|
| March 6, 1997 |
Get It: 83 |
Vol. 1, No. 38 |
DAY 3 (San Jose): Blah blah
blah ... the final day of bein' assaulted by people I
don't know but I should admire because they're "up
there" 'n I'm not ... Mr. Sterling was entertainin'
... he scolded us all for not havin' a life ... went on
to admit that he was in San Jose on vacation ... doin'
the speech for fun! ... wait a minute! ... who needs a
life? ... then there was the Raj Reddy from Carnegie-Mellon
who kept showin' us bits o' film clips ... saved 'im havin'
to write a speech ... all about the driverless cars they've
developed ... Murray Gell-Mann's credentials were impressive
... he'd gotten a Nobel Prize ... he discovered the quark
... (which I thought was the sound a duck made when it
got one of those plastic six-pack holders stuck 'round
it's neck!) ... that's one of those sub-atomic particles
that we're s'posed to believe in ... I'm glad it finished
when it did ... I had this strange feelin' I was bein'
brainwashed into some kind of cult ... the "paddle
voting" cult ... oh I forgot that part ... each of
us had a paddle ... the top of which was coated on one
side with a green reflective stuff 'n red on the other
... between speakers we'd be asked questions 'n we'd vote
by raisin' our paddles with one side or the other pointed
at the front ... I woulda brought one back but they seemed
to be top secret ... they wouldn't let us take 'em out
of the room ... the association claimed there were about
1,800 of us in attendance ... probably 1,743 of us were
guys ... some you had to watch which bathroom they chose
before you assigned 'em a category ... lot's o' beards
... ponytails ... white socks ... the guys, too ... I
wonder if you can get sick from second-hand radiation!
... it was like a forest of droids durin' coffee breaks
with everyone walkin' 'round with the cellular phones
to their ears ... what they really needed to do was set
up a slew of terminals ... some chat room software ...
then the participants might've found it easier to communicate
... there'd be some groups assembled discussin' some new
esoteric technology ... cornerin' speakers to argue points
with 'em ... but mostly folks jes' wandered around eyein'
each other suspiciously not knowin' what to do in a face-to-face
situation ... I didn't feel too out of place ... even
though I wasn't a researcher for some university ... Dean
of a computer science department ... somethin' really
snobby like that ... but I survived ... to be faced with
the flight from Hell! ... I was lucky to be in an aisle
seat ... the flight was full ... the final row occupant
came up ... a young mother with her baby ... 'bout a year
old I'd reckon ... she took the middle ... the baby was
a little restless at first but finally drifted off to
sleep ... then the flight attendants came 'round 'n stirred
the pot by offerin' the drink service ... baby woke up
... I know how I feel bein' strapped into an airplane
seat for any length of time 'n that baby was actin' jes'
like how I felt ... the mom was wavin' her hot coffee
in the air to keep it out of reach of the now bouncin'
baby girl ... who was startin' to have cryin' spells ...
between the mom tryin' to force the bottle in her mouth
... (I seem to remember those days ... I tried to keep
cool but the miles were really draggin' by) ... mom let
the baby "read" the airline magazine ... I must
admit the child had the best manual dexterity I've seen
in one that young ... it was almost as if she knew what
she was doin' when she tore out all the pages! ... mom
'n child went for a walk but we hit turbulence 'n she
came back ... oh I know that sounds so terrible but what
can I say ... the babe's ears musta been hurtin' (or she
jes' felt like cryin' ... I know I was beginnin' to feel
that way myself) ... she was givin' us quite a serenade
... mom was frantic to get her settled 'n decided a little
cereal was in order ... our window person helped her mix
up a nice batch o' somethin' ... I remember from experience
that it's pretty dangerous to stuff food in a cryin' baby
... sure 'nuff ... any airsick bags in the house?!?!?
|
"Each generation seems to
have some startling revelation that's supposed to change
humanity. Will this be the generation of Asteroids?"
-- Mikey, Thinkin' Too Hard
|
| Mikey's Muse(tm)
is published weekdays as a commentary on stuff. Editor,
Michael T. Rusk. Copyright © 1997 by Michael T. Rusk.
Printed in the U.S.A. This publication may be distributed
freely as long as there is no charge. Commentary is loosely
based on actual events and may contain embellishments,
bits of fiction, and editorial liberties (lies) under
the guise of poetic license. All characters portrayed
in my writing are purely fictional and any resemblance
to any person, company or animal is purely unintentional.
If you don't get it, you just don't get it. Don't blame
me for anything I say and don't do anything I say, either.
|
|
|
|
|
