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| March 28, 1997 |
Get It: 102 |
Vol. 1, No. 54 |
ARGHHH: It's gonna be one o'
them days ... first ... it's the dreaded end of the physical
day ... that postponed snappin' o' the rubber glove ...
I got up early to connect to the Internet ... after 30
minutes of losin' my connection I lost my patience ...
so much for modern technology ... I don't know how anybody
thinks there can be spaceships when we can't even make
a decent telephone line! ... I gave up ... came upstairs
... remembered the dogs needed to be let out ... I decided
to start some coffee ... found the box o' beans ... carefully
measured 'em out ... poured the water ... fired it all
up ... the dogs were tunneling through the patio door
... let 'em in ... they kept nippin' at my heels ... dancin'
'round in circles ... jumpin' at the cupboard ... didn't
take me long to remember the ol' rule of the West ...
"he who lets the dogs out first has to feed them"
... rats ... now I remember why I sneak off in the black
of the mornin'! ... I give 'em their new "lite"
food ... tryin' to deflate the football ... I grab my
favorite cup outta the cupboard ... (it has 'boss' written
all over it ... I love the irony) ... I grab the pot ...
pour ... wait a minute ... how come it's still water?
... I pull out the basket ... oh ... that's right ...
ya gotta grind this fancy stuff ... we're havin' a new
taste treat this mornin' ... roasted, scalded coffee!
... mmmmmmm ... now where'd she put the whipped cream?
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SILENCE: That's the best policy
... at what point do I say "when's the mulch comin'?"
... wifey-poo hasn't mentioned a word ... that's our Easter
project ... if she didn't call then I can act all put
out ... "how come you didn't call?!?!?" ...
I can really put on a good act ... if I remind her too
soon then she could still call the guy today 'n I bet
he'd be able to make it over tomorrow ... but if I wait
'til tonight then maybe we'll miss ... oh darn ... the
way my luck's been runnin' he'll be ding-dongin' my doorbell
at 7 in the mornin' ... at least it's not manure!
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EVEN THE DOG!: Everybody tries
to get in on the act ... even my Min-Pin ... she's sittin'
here at the end of the bench ... talkin' away ... not
the irritating barkin' kind o' stuff ... but a real conversation
... like you'd see on David Letterman's stupid pet tricks
... I can't tell if she's wantin' me to write about how
hungry she is ... how she's so malnourished ... she wants
me to go on television ... plead for money ... "only
32 cents a day could feed this starvin' puppy!" ...
I'd send you her picture ... she'd put a muddy paw print
on letter once a month ... why if you're really generous
I'd send her out to live with you! ... but then again
she may be tellin' me the story 'bout how she caught a
squirrel one time ... how she wants me to go out on the
deck 'n act like a nut so more squirrels'll come ... oh
wait a minute ... I get it now... Timmy's in the well
out by the old Johnson place!?!?!? ... wait a minute girl
... let me get the tractor!
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"Sometimes you can fool your
brain but your heart always knows the truth." --
Mikey, Thinkin' Too Hard
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| Mikey's Muse(tm)
is published weekdays as a commentary on stuff. Editor,
Michael T. Rusk. Copyright © 1997 by Michael T. Rusk.
Printed in the U.S.A. This publication may be distributed
freely as long as there is no charge. Commentary is loosely
based on actual events and may contain embellishments,
bits of fiction, and editorial liberties (lies) under
the guise of poetic license. All characters portrayed
in my writing are purely fictional and any resemblance
to any person, company or animal is purely unintentional.
If you don't get it, you just don't get it. Don't blame
me for anything I say and don't do anything I say, either.
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