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| April 16, 1997 |
Get It: 105 |
Vol. 1, No. 66 |
TIDBITS: Been to Sri Lanka
lately? … maybe shook hands with the 1995 female
entrepreneur of the year? … all is not as it seems
… she was arrested last Saturday … for bein’
a man … “she’d” been runnin’
a Prawn export business for the last three years …
was legally married to a man … I wonder if the husband
was the last to know? … hope you got your taxes mailed
yesterday … or the extension … I heard Disney
turned Pleasure Island into a tax preparation clinic …
had IRS agents there to send the forms in … that’d
be my choice for an evenin’ at a night club …
I wonder if you could take off the admission as part of
the preparation service? … be that as it may …
Americans on average will work until May 9 for taxes …
that’s only 3 more weeks … I wonder what it’s
like in other countries? … if you’re wanderin’
‘round the ‘net lookin’ for somethin’
a little different to do … stop by “The BrainTainment
Center” at http://www.brain.com/ … they’ve
got a free on-line IQ test … actually several of
‘em … they’re kind of fun … apparently
they offer a product that’s like a Nordic Track for
the brain … but my closet’s full so I didn’t
take ‘em up on the offer … by the way …
let’s not share results … OK?
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COMIN’ SOON: Things to
look forward to … I’ll say it one more time
… pay attention … National Secretaries Day is
a week from today … don’t forget! … then
there’s May Day … do they still do the big parades
in Russia? … or is it jes’ Cuba that celebrates?
… then we’ve got Outdoor Ed for the 6th graders
… where the teachers accompany 100+ 11 to 13 year
olds to the woods … for 3 days … this’ll
be the 4th time we’ve participated … wifey-poo
chaperoned daughters 1 ‘n 2 … I accompanied
#6 son 2 years ago … she’d given me all these
tips on how to win the different cabin inspections …
we smuggled candy in our luggage … left cutesy notes
for the inspectors … but puttin’ up lacy curtains
didn’t go over well … in the boys’ cabin
… we did win … once … peer pressure kept
us from doin’ it again … we didn’t have
to worry ‘bout keepin’ the shower clean …
since it was never used … we managed to keep our
group under control … ‘cept this year we’re
forbiddin’ the boys from bringin’ white tee-shirts
… they show up too well at night when you’re
tryin’ to sneak over to the girls’ cabins ‘n
scare ‘em! … then there’s Mother’s
Day on May 11th … for you newlywed guys out there
… remember to get somethin’ for your sweetie
… don’t ever ever ever use the line “but
you’re not my mother” as an excuse for no presents
… Memorial Day’s observed May 26th … so
we get a 3 day weekend … followed close on the heels
by #3’s weddin’ … the first weekend o’
June … ‘n I still don’t have any mulch!
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VIRGIN MARGARITA: A drink with
no alcohol? … no bite? … nope! … a Chihuahua
with no teeth! … almost anyway … she’d
been lookin’ like a chain smoker … with the
brown stained teeth on the bottom … we were ‘fraid
o’ germs if she bit us … got ‘em pulled
… now her tongue’ll have trouble stayin’
in ‘er mouth with no teeth to hold it in … we
put the teeth in a baggy … put it under ‘er
pillow … waitin’ to see if there’s a tooth
fairy for doggies … the only thing I noticed was
a small piece o’ torn lace trim next to the nana’s
bed with some blood spots on it … I swear the dog
was smilin’!
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“Be brave, move out of your
safety zone today and speak to a stranger on the elevator.
You’ll be surprised how everyone gets off at the
next stop.” -- Mikey, Thinkin’ Too Hard
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| Mikey's Muse(tm)
is published weekdays as a commentary on stuff. Editor,
Michael T. Rusk. Copyright © 1997 by Michael T. Rusk.
Printed in the U.S.A. This publication may be distributed
freely as long as there is no charge. Commentary is loosely
based on actual events and may contain embellishments,
bits of fiction, and editorial liberties (lies) under
the guise of poetic license. All characters portrayed
in my writing are purely fictional and any resemblance
to any person, company or animal is purely unintentional.
If you don't get it, you just don't get it. Don't blame
me for anything I say and don't do anything I say, either.
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