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| April 21, 1997 |
Get It: 106 |
Vol. 1, No. 69 |
ORGY: Of eating anyway ...
I've been kind of fixatin' on eatin' a Bloomin' Onion
from Outback ... Friday night we went to a new one that'd
opened near our end o' the world ... had to order one
... kinda disappointin' ... hit some raw spots in the
batter ... I wanted it to be crisper ... more like beer-batter
dipped ... but the steak was excellent ... mine was still
wigglin' on the plate ... mmmmmmm ... Saturday night we
took the boys to Red, Hot 'n Blue ... one o' them late
dinners ... not yet satisfied with the onion kick we ordered
an onion loaf ... now that's more like it! ... crispy
rings ... drippin' with grease ... now if we'd been able
to have Outback's sauce, these rings ... that'd been perfection
... the pulled pork sandwich was superb ... as we drove
outta the parkin' lot I swear I saw a blonde-headed gal
... actually she didn't have any hair ... a cutoff sweatshirt
top ... runnin' after our car ... screamin "Stop
the insanity!" ... I turned up the radio 'n kept
goin' ... last night we decided to jes' stay home ...
cook a few things on the deck ... even though we had to
bundle up in blankets ... they kept callin' me the Outbreak
Café ... 'cuz I kept touchin' the raw chicken to the hamburger
... had to cook the hamburger again to make sure there
wasn't no raw chicken germs on it ... didn't have no onion
either ... today I promise to get back on the wagon ...
'til tomorrow anyway.
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ONE MORE STORY: I'd thought
I'd give it a rest ... ya know how I been crackin' on
Volvo's ... but this one's jes too good ... wifey-poo's
been kinda lookin' askance at me 'n my Volvo tirade ...
she was figgerin' I was full of somethin' ... but she
had a near miss last Friday ... a car pulled right in
front of her ... WP was horrified ... that was the first
time she'd been so blatantly challenged while drivin'
the Suburban ... after the shock wore off she realized
the other car was a Volvo station wagon ... she said the
driver jes' did a little wave 'n smiled ... couldn't turn
her head ... acted like she owned the road ... it's like
collectin' stories 'bout alien abductions!
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CONSTIPATION: That's right
... if they can do a whole cartoon show 'bout a guy sittin'
on the john strainin' to do his duty then I s'pose we
can start off Monday mornin' givin' 'im his due ... I
jes' don't know how much lower a network can sink ...
can you believe a whole half-hour dedicated to G.I. tests
... bran muffins ... (that he fed the dog 'n the dog kept
havin' to go out) ... his kid helpin' run the medical
equipment ... his wife sittin' next to 'im ... I swear
I don't know who these people think'd watch that kind
of senseless drivel ... I mean ... oh ... well I didn't
really watch it ... um ... someone was tellin' me 'bout
it ... yeah ... that's right ... a friend was describin'
it to me ... naw ... I'd a never watched anythin' THAT
stupid ... I'm much more sophisticated than that ... well
... OK ... I confess ... but what else was I s'posed to
do ... I was waitin' for X-Files to come on!
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"The only thing worse than
a blank mind is a mind that's blank." -- Mikey,
Thinkin' Too Hard
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| Mikey's Muse(tm)
is published weekdays as a commentary on stuff. Editor,
Michael T. Rusk. Copyright © 1997 by Michael T. Rusk.
Printed in the U.S.A. This publication may be distributed
freely as long as there is no charge. Commentary is loosely
based on actual events and may contain embellishments,
bits of fiction, and editorial liberties (lies) under
the guise of poetic license. All characters portrayed
in my writing are purely fictional and any resemblance
to any person, company or animal is purely unintentional.
If you don't get it, you just don't get it. Don't blame
me for anything I say and don't do anything I say, either.
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