January 13, 1996 Volume 2, No. 2

SEND THE ST. BERNARDS!: This has been terrible! . . . we were definitely trapped . . . started last Saturday night . . . we shoveled the driveway first thing Sunday . . . my son got caught out in the storm . . . couldn't get back to his place . . . he sought refuge here . . . we shoveled every couple of hours . . . it just kept coming down . . . it was so much fun . . . at first . . .then the puzzle got maddening . . . the constant drone of the television . . . about the storm . . . everything was closed on Monday . . . Tuesday . . . almost . . . I made it to work on Wednesday . . . schools were closed for the rest of the week . . . I took 'em all in with me to work on Thursday . . . they helped catch up some clerical stuff . . . then we got stuck in the biggest . . . nastiest . . . grid-lock you ever did see . . . we crawled for about two hours . . . took us a total of 3 hours to get home . . . then it snowed again! . . . I didn't even try to go in . . . good thing I have the hook up from home . . . the plows came . . . covered up our nicely shoveled paths to the street . . . arghhhhh . . . took me another hour to dig out the end of the driveway . . . but it finally started warming up today . . . we saw some geese fly over . . . low . . . lookin' for food . . . I swore I heard one of them say to another . . . "This is as far south as we need to go?" . . . "That's the last time I'll listen to you!"

BACK TO WORK: Those poor guv'ment workers . . . finally got a shot at goin' back . . . then got snowed out . . . what a fiasco . . . they're talkin' about the sick plants . . . dusty offices . . . stuff you don't think about . . . it's been like a ghost town in downtown DC . . . somethin' oughta be done about this mess . . . but then again it's not my style to start rantin' an' ravin' 'bout stuff I don't know 'bout . . . like I made the chance comment that I just didn't understand why everyone was so up tight about the bloomin' milk! . . . I mean . . . drink water or somethin' else! . . . boy . . . did I get an earful! . . . "what about the baby that wants a milk bottle" . . . "what about cereal for breakfast" . . . "what're you gonna cook with if it calls for milk" . . . and several more excellent reasons why you need milk in a snowstorm . . . good thing I didn't bring up about usin' your finger if you run out of toilet paper!

FRIENDS: No . . . not the kind you have . . . the kind you watch . . . on TV . . . to see who drinks the Diet Coke in the commercial . . . of course we're hysterical . . . we have a load of Monica's . . . so I know right away it won't be her . . . it was Ross . . . now we got Chandler . . . you can be sure he won't be sippin' the stuff! . . . we're so easy to amuse nowadays . . . it beats watchin' the news coverage of the storm . . . the Stars Wars Trilogy . . . Caroline in the City, Ellen, Grace, Home Improvement . . . I watched Homicide for the first time last night . . . only because it is filmed in Baltimore . . . I don't know if I like the reality of knowing the sites . . . and what's with this "shakey" camera filming style? . . . is this the new trick to make you think it's more real than it is? . . . it started with "NYPD Blue" . . . makes me seasick! . . . the way they shove the camera up people's noses . . . even my home videos are steadier!

TIRED OF WHITE: Even the boys are ready to go back to school . . . they've been off so long . . . with winter break . . . followed by the storm . . . they don't go back until Tuesday . . . holiday on Monday . . . I know Mama's ready to have them back in school! . . . all they do is watch television . . . eat . . . sleep . . . play outside in the snow . . . come to think of it . . . that's all I've been doing too! . . . hmmmmmmm . . . sure hope it melts soon!

"It's better to let your wife pick your friends. At least that way you can blame her if you don't like 'em." --Mikey, Thinking Too Hard